Comments on: I Only Date Chinese http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/ Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:53:47 -0800 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 By: Mike http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/comment-page-1/#comment-191 Mike Thu, 15 Feb 2007 20:45:52 +0000 http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/#comment-191 I once dated a Chinese American girl who, after being scarred by an abusive Chinese American boyfriend, hadn't dated Asian Americans for years. Later, she changed her view because she wanted a family with a "strong, common Chinese culture." Her family also pressured her in this direction. For me, while I'm an EOD, I do have a preference for girls with somewhat of a similar culture. i.e. I have more in common with Americans (from America) than Asians (from Asia). I look more for strong, common values rather than a strong, common culture. (I'm guessing for some, that's the same thing though.) I once dated a Chinese American girl who, after being scarred by an abusive Chinese American boyfriend, hadn’t dated Asian Americans for years.

Later, she changed her view because she wanted a family with a “strong, common Chinese culture.” Her family also pressured her in this direction.

For me, while I’m an EOD, I do have a preference for girls with somewhat of a similar culture. i.e. I have more in common with Americans (from America) than Asians (from Asia). I look more for strong, common values rather than a strong, common culture. (I’m guessing for some, that’s the same thing though.)

]]> By: Christine http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/comment-page-1/#comment-137 Christine Tue, 13 Feb 2007 23:20:46 +0000 http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/#comment-137 Thanks for remembering me Mike. S'ok, I do tend to date Asian-North Americans ... you read right ... on both sides of the border, baby! Let's just say, I was an EOD, then I realized I wanted to start a family. It's already hard merging two lives together and the way I see it, for my partner to not understand or know the nuances within the culture, no matter how much they try or are well intentioned, is one hurdle I'm not willing to deal with - but for someone like my sister, whose Italian boyfriend loves her dearly and my cousin whose wife and 4 children of Chinese-Filipino-Irish descent, that sort of thing doesn't matter that much. And that's ok for them. Thanks for remembering me Mike. S’ok, I do tend to date Asian-North Americans … you read right … on both sides of the border, baby! Let’s just say, I was an EOD, then I realized I wanted to start a family. It’s already hard merging two lives together and the way I see it, for my partner to not understand or know the nuances within the culture, no matter how much they try or are well intentioned, is one hurdle I’m not willing to deal with – but for someone like my sister, whose Italian boyfriend loves her dearly and my cousin whose wife and 4 children of Chinese-Filipino-Irish descent, that sort of thing doesn’t matter that much. And that’s ok for them.

]]> By: Hiren P. http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/comment-page-1/#comment-136 Hiren P. Tue, 13 Feb 2007 19:20:53 +0000 http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/#comment-136 I've dated a lot of different girls from different backgrounds but it has always been a struggle. My parents are immigrants from India to the U.S. and so they don't understand that people date out of their race. I have come into line with them too in the sense that I do now date more Indian people. The pressure to preserve my traditions and culture may be a bit too much for me to marry someone out of my race. I’ve dated a lot of different girls from different backgrounds but it has always been a struggle. My parents are immigrants from India to the U.S. and so they don’t understand that people date out of their race. I have come into line with them too in the sense that I do now date more Indian people. The pressure to preserve my traditions and culture may be a bit too much for me to marry someone out of my race.

]]> By: susan http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/comment-page-1/#comment-135 susan Tue, 13 Feb 2007 18:16:20 +0000 http://www.8asians.com/2007/02/13/i-only-date-chinese/#comment-135 I don't date anymore (I've been married for 18 years. I'm ancient). But I think about this question. I had a rather intensely unsavory experience with an Asian-American guy (from my CHURCH, no less) when I was 13. I steered way clear after that; I was kind of phobic. I met my husband (who is white) in my mid 20s, we got married, and here we are. I love him. But I often wonder about the Asian-American identity slipping away from our family through the generations, if our daughters end up not being with Asian-American partners either. I don’t date anymore (I’ve been married for 18 years. I’m ancient). But I think about this question. I had a rather intensely unsavory experience with an Asian-American guy (from my CHURCH, no less) when I was 13. I steered way clear after that; I was kind of phobic. I met my husband (who is white) in my mid 20s, we got married, and here we are. I love him. But I often wonder about the Asian-American identity slipping away from our family through the generations, if our daughters end up not being with Asian-American partners either.

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