A funny thing occurred in the comment section regarding the previous blog post on Asian parents making their kids play musical instruments; a tangent topic was brought up about taking their kids out for sports teams. From Eddy:
…do APA parents ever force their kids to play sports the way Caucausian parents do? (It’s a generalization, I know.) While being forced to learn how to play a musical instrument seems pretty common, I don’t usually hear about the same thing when it come to sports.
To which asiandragon replied:
Many parents on the West Coast especially those in the second and third generation ones in Asian areas like the Bay Area, LA / Orange County and Sacramento tend to encourage their kids to participate in sports (Asian basketball leagues, martial arts and golf).
My parents actually encouraged participation in sports like track and basketball and the fighting arts instead of music. My mom didn’t want me to get my butt kicked by the white racists in my school.
Basketball leagues. I do remember Japanese American friends signing up for that growing up.
It’s funny, because now that I think about it - my parents DID sign me up for something physical; kung-fu lessons every Sunday with this retired guy at some shady park in Berkeley. I was NOT an in-shape kid growing up so the thought of doing anything physically? Fuck that, I would rather be penetrated through an ocular cavity. Actually, I think I tried once, and my parents threw their hands up at my dramatic tirade and let me quit. But basketball or soccer is definitely something more Americanized parents would agree to. And I’m not sure how I feel about that.
How about you?
(Photo apologies: Berkeley Ohtani Basketball Program)
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John wrote:
My parents had zero interest in me taking up any sports, and at the time, I thought sports were for only dumb jocks. I did play intramural football one season because my friends were interested. I wish I had taken up sports though - and built up a habit of exercising regularly and getting into shape.
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 10:22 am | Permalink
eddy wrote:
Thanks, Ernie, for taking note of my suggestion. My two cents on the topic:
The interesting thing about the pressure that Asian parents exert on their children to learn how to play a musical instrument is that it’s often based on this perception that playing music = getting into a “good” college. And yet, I believe that playing organized sports probably does just as much — if not more — in terms of getting a kid into college, especially when you consider the favorable qualities that are associated with playing sports (leadership, teamwork, etc.). Not saying you can’t achieve the same if you’re first chair of your high school orchestra; just that organized sports can also be viewed in a positive light beyond just “it helps my kid get some exercise”.
Which makes me wonder is there isn’t something else that needs to be considered. Namely, that Asian parents don’t think their kids can be “good” enough to do well in organized sports vs playing a musical instrument. No such thing as a height disadvantage when playing the piano, you know?.
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 10:36 am | Permalink
Grace Chu wrote:
Yes! What you learn on the playing field - teamwork, leadership, strategy, etc. will help you in the long run, especially in the business world. Forcing your kid to play solo classical instruments is a ticket to dorkdom.
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 12:18 pm | Permalink
jennifer wrote:
i spoke to my mom about the previous post on asian parents and urging their kids to get into music…she said that she encouraged us because music helps develop the brain, while giving us an appreciation for the arts. i don’t know about the brain development part, but i go to as many symphony concerts as I can now
Music has been generally been associated with specialized brain development, but I’m not sure about sports…definitely something to look into? Boxing’s not good for your brain though!!
The cute Asian boys in high school were all on the volleyball team or the water polo team. We watched a lot of water polo our high school years, because we thought it was so important to have school spirit…
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 12:21 pm | Permalink
Xxxtine wrote:
I concur with Grace’s comment … my dad enrolled me in Karate lessons … again, not really asking and only sending me, and so the interactions with your fellow classmates created a nice social atmosphere as opposed to being privately tutored by an adult who forgot what it’s like to be a kid.
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 1:15 pm | Permalink
ancient one wrote:
Forced is such a harsh word - “strongly encouraged” is better. My parents never forced me to join sports and never objected when I joined the wrestling teams in junior high and high school. They did get annoyed when I skipped meals to make weight, though.
All my kids did sports. My daughter played volleyball. My oldest son does basketball, volleyball, and flag football, and youngest does track and basketball. They chose which sports they wanted to do. Sports have been a very positive experience, and they have really improved my sons’ confidence. I let them choose what they wanted to do, and really didn’t force it. I tried that once with one son, and it didn’t work. I wanted them to learn to exercise, training and work together on a team - important things to learn in life.
I have coached Asian American kids for several years in volleyball, basketball, and track. It’s been interesting. There are some Asian American parents who won’t let their kids on a team, saying that they should “focus on academics.” Other parents don’t think it is worth the time, and won’t make the time commitment to have their kids do well. I had a 4×100 relay team that got scratched because one team member didn’t make the meet, leaving one of the girls was nearly in tears because that was her last competition (and they had won the league championship the year before). There are a few Asian American parents who are get overinvolved. It’s ugly to see parents throw chairs when upset over one of their kids sporting events.
From all the youth sports that I have attended, it is encouraging to see many Asian American boys and girls involved, ranging from Chinese, Indian, to Filipino Americans. Check out the Silicon Valley girls NJB champions (http://www.berryessamilpitasnjb.org/site2/Home.html). I have sense, though, that some parents push sports as a way to get into better schools. I remember that one junior high volleyball coach that I coached against was really annoyed because he felt that a lot of girls joined his 8th grade volleyball (having not played before) just so they could put some sports on their high school applications (private high schools here in Silicon valley can be really competitve to get into).
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 3:46 pm | Permalink
YvesPaul wrote:
Me and Sports are enemies. But Kung Fu is an interesting enough topic that in my middle (*cough old) age I find myself drawn to. I’d like to be able to beat ass. lol
Posted on 17-Mar-08 at 3:51 pm | Permalink
Charles wrote:
I don’t know whether their parents have anything to do with it, but there are a lot of Asian basketball players (as well as volleyball players) at my gym (the Y).
Posted on 18-Mar-08 at 12:13 am | Permalink
Simon Bao wrote:
I must agree with Ancient One above… what the hell is behind the idea of any kid being “forced” to do things?
I hope the Millennial Generation of AsianAms doesn’t plan on *forcing* our kids into things, the way some of us were.
One can earn AsianAm Parent of the Year ribbons by simply ensuring that kids have countless opportunities to try new things, explore them, play around with them, find out what appeals to them. Team sports, solo sports, music, visual arts, whatever it might be. If a kid prefers rock collections, so be it, she or he might develop into a Nobel Prize winning geologist.
But forcing kids into activities like sports seems as ill-advised and harmful as denying kids the chance to play sports.
Posted on 18-Mar-08 at 5:56 am | Permalink
Winnie wrote:
This series of conversations reminds me of these ads:
http://www.flickr.com/search/?q=obay&w=all&s=int
Posted on 18-Mar-08 at 9:27 am | Permalink
pete wrote:
when you look at the cultural history of china there is not too many sports as we are familiar with i.e. baseball, football, tennis, … but has a history of it’s martial arts, which i may say branches out to gymnastics, acrobatics, ….. also i think music is emphasised because it’s something we can do the rest of our lives chinese love longevity things, ,,, and the western thought of the human body as a physical thing of beauty, like point out one naked asain statue as an art form, asian culture emphasize the spirit or virtue than the outward appearances…. and there you have it.
Posted on 20-Mar-08 at 10:51 am | Permalink