I’m a Fil-Am that grew up among several other Fil-Ams in So Cal and looking back, I consider myself very fortunate to have grown up in an environment like that. I could bring weird, even smelly, food in my lunch box to school and no one thought it was too weird (though I would never bring something as smelly as tuyo to school).

I also have a huge family like many other Filipinos, and my mom’s side of the family in particular all live close to each other. When they first immigrated here, they all lived with us, including my grandparents, and that made for some fun times. That also meant that a lot of Tagalog was spoken in my house growing up, and I, intrepid child I was, was determined to find out what they were talking about. Sure, my relatives laughed at me a lot, but they could tell I really wanted to learn Tagalog and were patient enough with me to correct my mistakes. Twenty-something years later, and I understand and speak Tagalog fairly well. I took some classes at university and the two times I went to the Philippines, everyone I encountered was amazed that I spoke so well. I do consider myself an oddball though, because all those Fil-Ams I grew up with? Some can understand a great deal, but hardly any of them can hold a conversation beyond “Salamat” and “Kumusta ka?” I’m well aware of all the reasons many Fil-Ams don’t speak their parents’ languages, but it still disappoints me that both parents and children are complicit in this. Language is a vital part of what connects us to our culture and ancestry and yet many Fil-Ams I know never bother to learn Tagalog, Ilocano, Kapampangan, or whatever their parents speak.

Who knows, maybe the third-generation of Fil-Ams will have a renewed interest in learning their grandparents’ language. My partner is Chinese and if we get married and have kids, I’m pushing for our kids to be trilingual!

I’m a Fil-Am that grew up among several other Fil-Ams in So Cal and looking back, I consider myself very fortunate to have grown up in an environment like that. I could bring weird, even smelly, food in my lunch box to school and no one thought it was too weird (though I would never bring something as smelly as tuyo to school).

I also have a huge family like many other Filipinos, and my mom’s side of the family in particular all live close to each other. When they first immigrated here, they all lived with us, including my grandparents, and that made for some fun times. That also meant that a lot of Tagalog was spoken in my house growing up, and I, intrepid child I was, was determined to find out what they were talking about. Sure, my relatives laughed at me a lot, but they could tell I really wanted to learn Tagalog and were patient enough with me to correct my mistakes. Twenty-something years later, and I understand and speak Tagalog fairly well. I took some classes at university and the two times I went to the Philippines, everyone I encountered was amazed that I spoke so well. I do consider myself an oddball though, because all those Fil-Ams I grew up with? Some can understand a great deal, but hardly any of them can hold a conversation beyond “Salamat” and “Kumusta ka?” I’m well aware of all the reasons many Fil-Ams don’t speak their parents’ languages, but it still disappoints me that both parents and children are complicit in this. Language is a vital part of what connects us to our culture and ancestry and yet many Fil-Ams I know never bother to learn Tagalog, Ilocano, Kapampangan, or whatever their parents speak.

Who knows, maybe the third-generation of Fil-Ams will have a renewed interest in learning their grandparents’ language. My partner is Chinese and if we get married and have kids, I’m pushing for our kids to be trilingual!