
“I WANT A COTILLION!!”
If The Daughter is anything, she definitely is NOT subtle. What’s a cotillion, also known as a debut? For Filipinos, it’s a coming out party for girls, similar to a quinceanera but for eighteen year old girls. These affairs can be extremely elaborate, with choreographed dances, a big reception, formal wear and relatives coming from long distances. They can cost as much as a wedding. Gene Cajayon made one of my favorite Asian-American movies called The Debut about the events during the day of one such cotillion. But in this article from the San Francisco Chronicle, Cajayon says he is not a fan of the debut as held in the US:
“It comes from the Spanish Eurocentric point of view and there sometimes isn’t anything indigenously Filipino in the ball.”
He also adds that Filipino-American parents are sometimes pressured into having them even if they can’t afford them.
This dad in particular rejects the idea of a debut as I think about impending college costs, but The Daughter will say things like “I’m your only daughter!” or “D. is having one and her family doesn’t have a lot of money.” I’m not sure where she got this idea of a debut in her head as she has never been to one, but it’s probably a combination of going to her classmates’ quinceaneras and the pernicious influence of MTV’s My Supersweet 16 (how I hate that show!) I’m curious, do other Asian cultures have these kind of events?
Something new to me is a Mantillion: the male equivalent of a debut or a cotillion for the more metrosexual kind of Filipino guy. With any luck, Number One Son and Number Two Son won’t get any ideas.
(Flickr photo credit: ‘El Photo)
2 Comments to “Filipino Debuts, Cotillions and Mantillions”
Facebook User wrote:
I don't know about huge parties, but I do know that in Japan, turning 20 is your official “coming of age” where young women and men dress up in traditional formal kimonos and take portraits. My mom made me do it and I just looked like an awful picture bride.
Posted on 11-Jun-09 at 10:04 am | Permalink
facebook-881645042 wrote:
My cousin told me that when she turned 18, her mom asked her if she wanted a cotillion or money/ jewelry. She took the money.
My other cousin didn't really want a cotillion but her mom insisted. The photo she took has a really classic expression lol. … and I had to Emcee the event.
Posted on 12-Jun-09 at 7:54 am | Permalink
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