We love it when Asians behave badly. It gives us something to gossip about and also, it makes us feel pretty badass. It’s true. It’s like a slap in the face to that annoying stereotype about being submissive model minorities. You want high SAT scores? How about a dumb lawsuit?
Of course, this doesn’t mean we condone any sort of bad behavior. No, you shouldn’t lie about getting job offers and you shouldn’t try to steal money from cute boys. Actually, what am I even saying? These people make us look bad. Maybe I shouldn’t write about this.
So I’ll just say that I’ve been enjoying the case of 19 year old Rachel Lee and her burglary “bling ring”. If you’ve ever needed proof that paparazzi sites like TMZ are bad for society, then here you go: thanks to the proliferation of Hollywood gossip blogs like TMZ (and probably Google Maps), Lee and her friends were able to track down and rob the homes of Paris Hilton, Rachel Bilson, Lindsay Lohan, Audrina Patridge and other famous people who probably deserved it.
(I mean, let’s be real. They didn’t even have to break in: these people never locked their doors. Plus, like Paris Hilton ever wears the same outfit twice? Rachel probably put good use to those diamond watches.)
Conclusion: Rachel needs a book deal so she can tell us what exactly is inside Lindsay Lohan’s house. Cocaine? Discarded hair extensions? What’s left of her career?
Rachel. You’re Asian. You should be smart enough to get yourself out of this mess. Make us look good!
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View Comments to “Rachel Lee: Asian Teens Behaving Badly”
Ernie wrote:
Wow, look at the names these people have: Rachel Lee, Diana Tamayo, Alexis Neiers, Courtney Ames, Jonathan Ajar. That isn’t a theft ring, that’s a fucking yearbook out of Sweet Valley High.
Posted on 06-Nov-09 at 5:44 pm | Permalink
Jake wrote:
Apparently Rachel’s a chip off the ole block, just like her old man David Lee. Check this out, as far as I can tell father-n-daughter are up shit creek now, and in the worst way too:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091107/ap_on_en_ot/us_celebrity_burglaries_vegas
Apparently, he instructed her to take all the loot and go bury it in the Nevada desert so that she could cover her tracks. And that’s where she got caught, in her dad’s Las Vegas house. With all the loot, a baggie of dope, and about 20 grand… all in bills.
I mean, we all know there are shady Asian cliques out there, but this is what happens when you get caught up with some chickenhead whiteboys and whitegirls who think they’re above everyone else and the law. You actually start to think you ARE white and on top of that you become a stupid chickenhead, just like one of them.
Jesus, this girl needs to be deported, or locked up in a minimum-security Hilton hotel for a year or two. Maybe Paris will drop by to donate one of her old diamond watches.
Posted on 06-Nov-09 at 7:18 pm | Permalink
Moye wrote:
Like, totally.
Posted on 06-Nov-09 at 7:19 pm | Permalink
maria wrote:
umm I kinda hope Jake’s comment wasn’t knocking off white (half asian) people like me. Get caught up with me (i’m no “chickenhead”) and you might start travelling, working and living in foreign countries *gasp*.
Posted on 07-Nov-09 at 2:20 am | Permalink
Jake wrote:
I didn’t say all white people are chickenheads, but some most definitely are. Are you kidding me? Just look around… it’s not hard to find them. There are Asian chickenheads too, like Rachel Lee.
Posted on 07-Nov-09 at 11:11 am | Permalink
Matt wrote:
Is it wrong that I’m turned on when I find a cute mischievous Asian girl who doubles up as a modern day Robin Hood? Seriously, if there was anyone to steal from, I’d steal from Paris Hilton and other random celebutatnts. Secondly, Didn’t we learn in Better Luck Tomorrow that all Asians aren’t squeaky clean do-gooders? I’m all for this Rachel Lee and although she isn’t painting us in a perfect light, I’d love to meet this rebel. Heck, maybe we’ll even run a few heists here and there.
Posted on 09-Nov-09 at 4:57 pm | Permalink
Moye wrote:
No, not wrong. As long as you don’t go with the “me love you long time” stuff over her.
Here’s the bad idea with stealing from celebrities: they’re celebrities and any crime associated with their belongings will get lots of tabloid coverage. AKA Everyone will know about the crime and authorities are more inclined to figure out who did it. If you’re going with the Robin Hood approach, why not steal from rich Hollywood kids who wish they were on The Hills?
Posted on 10-Nov-09 at 10:06 am | Permalink
Matt wrote:
Not to brag or anything, but I happen to be a Jonin ranked ninja. Sooooooooo I’m probably not gonna get caught.
Posted on 10-Nov-09 at 1:46 pm | Permalink
Moye wrote:
Oh, well, that changes everything. Please proceed with your original plan.
Posted on 10-Nov-09 at 5:47 pm | Permalink
David K. wrote:
It would’ve been something else if the asian girl did it without the help of the white boyfriend, seems like without someone to lead them they’re boringly immobile and constantly complaining about how robotic asians like themselves are.
Posted on 14-Nov-09 at 2:24 pm | Permalink
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