Looking for Love on Asian Bride Websites

I always see advertisements about Asian brides whenever I Google anything related to Asians. Every once in a while, when I’m bored, I’ll even check them out.

These websites can be counted on for hours of entertainment. For example, take a look at Xiaoquin from China. She is one of the hottest 45 year olds I’ve ever seen and she doesn’t care how you look! Wow! If I wasn’t already married, I’d send off for her right away. I wonder if they have a layaway policy.

So I’m going to ignore the whole racist, sexist, stereotypical portrayals of Asian women inherent in these kinds of marriage services. I’ll just say that these websites are all of those things and much worse.  What fascinates me the most are the clientele: men looking for “international” and “traditional” women “who know how to treat a man.”

My first instinct is to make fun of these guys, like this one who, by the way, lives with his parents or this winner with a tattoo to show he’s hardcore, but also can’t spell. How many misspellings and grammatical errors can you find in his “My Match” section?

im lookin for someone who isnt afraid to say wat she thinks who deosnt care wat other people think and who is willing to compromise in certain cituaitions and who is open minded.

But I did find someone who I thought seemed nice and sweet. This man is relatively cute, he goes to Berkeley, and is pre-med so you know he’s not a complete idiot. But why is he posting his profile on an international marriage site? Doesn’t his mom know a good Chinese woman? Asian brother, contact me. I have friends who would probably go out with you.

Do other Asian American guys look for Asian brides? I didn’t. After a quick check on the other websites, the kid from Berkeley seems like an anomaly. Don’t believe me? Check out the “success” stories of such mail order relationships. I can’t read it (since most of it is not in English), but judging from the pictures, it seems like all the guys are older Caucasian men with younger Asian women. I’m not going to judge these men (they seem creepy to me) but they look exactly how I would imagine how men seeking mail order brides would look.

All these Asian bride websites had me question if there were sites for Asian grooms. The answers is sadly, no. To be honest, part of me is offended but the more I think about it, the more I believe that I might have stumbled upon a great business opportunity. Anyone want to invest?