The Chopstick Story

By Tim | Wednesday, May 26, 2010 | 7 Comments

Thanks for visiting 8Asians, a blog about Asian American issues. If you find this interesting, subscribe to the RSS feed, visit our Facebook Page or add us on Twitter!

Some time around my thirtieth birthday, my parents sat me down and gave me some of the treasured family heirlooms. Within the cache were two pairs of silver chopsticks, they were made with a round barrel, carved on the far ends, and attached with a silver chain at one end. Along with these two pair of chopsticks came a family story.

My grandmother was a very superstitious woman who believed in the advice of fortune tellers. So when her children were born she was curious to know their fates, and sought the advice of a numerologist. She provided her children’s birth dates and was told that her second eldest son was a “tiger” and eventually he would “devour” his parents. The fortune teller’s recommendation was to give the child away. So my grandparents sent away their second son, to his grandparents and let his grandparents raise him.

Shortly afterwards, their second daughter was born. My grandmother went to the same fortune teller and asked about her fate and was told a similar devastating story about the second daughter. In the end, it was recommended the second daughter also be given away. My grandparents happened to have friends who were childless. They gave their daughter to their friends to be raised. As a token of their appreciation, their friends presented my grandparents with a gift of two pairs of silver chopsticks (the same pair given to me by my parents). They vowed if for some reason they lost touch with each other they would pass on these stories to their families.

The friends would tell their new daughter of her true family, and let her know that if one day someone came by with the silver chopsticks and the story of the fortune teller, she would know they were her family. My grandparents passed on the same story to their family, letting my dad know he had a sister somewhere, and the silver chopsticks were the key to letting her know of their bond.

After telling me this story, my father also told me the legend of silver chopsticks. Silver chopsticks have a special place in Chinese culture, because it’s believed that former emperors used them exclusively to determine if there was poison in the food they were about to eat. Supposedly the silver would tarnish as soon as it touched any poison hidden in food. It’s considered a great honor to receive a pair of silver chopsticks as a gift because of this legend. A recent article on the history of chopsticks reminded me of my family story, and provides some additional detail to the silver chopsticks mythology. It also provided an interesting story about Confucius, who was a vegetarian. Confucius thought having knives at the dinner table was too vulgar, and some believe this led to a wider use of chopsticks in China.

Next time you pick up a pair of chopsticks, reflect a moment on the history, symbolism and meaning behind two pieces of wood.

Categories:

FamilyFood & DrinkHistory

NOTE: 8Asians.com is a community, and we thank you for being a part of it. While we welcome and appreciate differences in opinion, if you're rude or you're promoting spam, we have a right to edit or delete your comment. Read our comment policy for more information.

If you see a comment that violates the 8Asians.com comment policy, you may flag the comment by mousing over the comment and clicking "FLAG."

Facebook Comments (Beta)

http://www.8asians.com/author/ancientone95131/ jeffat8asians

That’s a wonderful story. I find it amazing that parents would give their children away based on a fortune tellers opinion. Did your Dad ever meet his sister or brother?
http://twitter.com/ballerinajen jennifer c

weird! my chinese friends swore that only koreans were odd enough to eat hot noodles with silver chopsticks, they had trouble holding onto the hot metal chopsticks when they ate Korean food with me. I asked my mom about this and she said that Korean emperors used to eat with silver chopsticks that would tarnish if poison was detected in their food. I guess the Chinese emperors did the same too, and my friends are just the weird ones
timat8asians

My dad and his brother were separated for over 40 years because of Chinese communism. He finally met his brother in 1984. I don’t know if he ever met his sister, but I know he knew of her before he passed away, because I took my parents to China in 2002 to visit the family home. The home was still standing, and he was able to talk to an elderly lady who had been a tenant of the home (the house itself was subdivided into apartments by the communist government). She said it had been a long time (years) since my dad’s sister had been by to collect rent from her. Where she is now, I don’t know, but it’s possible my uncle in China knows.
Fortune511

Hey Tim,
How much of this fortune telling do you believe? Would you do the same if it happen to you? Anyone can answer this message. I’m looking for someone who actually believes this stuff so i can just have a conversation with.
http://www.8asians.com/author/ancientone95131/ jeffat8asians

The Wife just read this story and really likes it. She says that she will think of you every time she uses chopsticks!
timat8asians

I never would have considered myself a believer, but my uncle ran the numbers for me about 10 years ago, and almost everything he told me about myself has come true in the intervening 10 years. A lot of it had to do with stuff that I had no control over. He said I’d hit a financial bump just before my 40s for example (the housing crash / stock crash). And other events like that.
http://hubpages.com/profile/Pamela+N+Red PamelaNRed

Touching story, Tim and beautiful chopsticks.