In modern pop culture, the Three Kingdoms period of China is kinda like the Medieval period to Americans — dramatic war stories full of people performing acts of valor and glory that have been dead of hundreds of years — except, you know, that shit was real. (Okay, King Arthur may be real, but the whole slaying flying dragons thing? Come on, now.) Which is probably why Red Cliff, the epic four-hour movie based on the Three Kingdoms period that was directed by John Woo last year smashed box office records in China previously owned by Titanic.

Now an abridged, westernized version Red Cliff is coming to America and if you live in the Southern California area, you’re in luck — you can watch a free screening in Los Angeles at the DGA. But here’s the catch — the free screening, especially geared towards 8Asians readers, is Wednesday night. Yep, tomorrow. To RSVP, YOU MUST send an email with the subject line “RED CLIFF RSVP – AAAN” to redcliffRSVP@gmail.com where you will receive further instructions. Priority will be given to registered people, but that does not guarantee a seat, so we recommend you arrive at least 30 minutes before the special 7pm screening time. And use the bathroom beforehand — this may be the abridged version, but with a 140-minute screening time, you’ll not want to miss any of the action.

So when the event was held this year in Taipei, what did Yahoo! Taiwan do? They hired lapdancers. Needless to say, a lot of people formerly affiliated with Yahoo!’s developer programs — already smarting from the lack of females in technology — were pretty pissed. (Full disclosure: I also previously worked at Yahoo!.) But a quick straw poll from the Taiwanese members of 8Asians kinda shrugged it off: one commenter on Gawker even noted that “being Taiwanese, all I can say is this is considered harmless fun in Taiwan and is culturally OK.” Also, people completely up in arms about this: your outrage should have started last year.

Is this an example of Yahoo! Taiwan completely going over the line? Or is this truly just a cultural thing?

Even though my parents came to the US from Taiwan in the 70s, I’m not a fan of Taiwanese pop music; maybe it’s because so much of it seem to come from Boy Bands from mainland China or consist of numbingly slow love ballads with videos of forlorn looking couples looking sad at each other in some random-ass wheat field. (Seriously, why are there so many Taiwanese ballad music videos of someone standing in a field? They have buildings, right?)

But this music video by Taiwanese indie-pop band WonFu — not to be confused with Asian American product company Wong Fu Productions — I can get behind, mostly because it takes all of that bubble-gum cheeriness that Taiwanese people love so much and puts it behind a bassline; imagine the catchy hooks of Puffy AmiYumi put through the wringer of a Taiwanese variety show, goofy sound effects and all. If you think they’re good enough to catch live, they’ll be touring cities and venues up and down the West Coast, including Seattle, Portland, San Francisco and schools like Cal Berkeley and UCLA.

• 10th Annual San Diego Asian Film Festival – The San Diego Asian Film Festival is an annual event of the San Diego Asian Film Foundation, a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting and promoting the diverse Pan Asian experience through the media arts. We’ve been around since 2000, premiering films from around the world. Our emphasis is on Asian American cinema, but we also showcase international films, along with shorts, animation, experimental films and music videos. Along with films, patrons will be able to meet and speak with filmmakers and actors, enjoy meaningful discussions, and enjoy nightly parties. (October 15, 2009 to October 29, 2009, San Diego)

(Hat tip: George)

Ever since Debbie Lee made a, uhm, less than stellar attempt at becoming The Next Food Network Star, there’s been a noticeable lack of Asian Americans from the South talking about food.

Enter Natalie and Margaret Keng, a mother and daughter team from Smyrna, Georgia who describe themselves as two Chinese Southern Belles that instruct a course on Asian Fusion History at nearby Emory University in Atlanta. Here you can watch them go into a supermarket and explain oriental snacks, like Haw Flakes and the oh-so-mysterious Pineapple Cake.

Okay, so I jest a little bit. While the “Ni hao, y’all” at the end of the video made me bury my face in my hands a little bit, you gotta realize this video wasn’t made for us — I can only assume the video and class is made for a roomful of Scarlet O’Haras, middle-aged women that would faint at the sight of chicken feet not on a plantation served on a dinner plate. And personally, this Yankee is intrigued by the thought of Fried Rice-a-Roni or five-space rutabaga. I’ll try anything once, y’all.

(Hat tip: Stan, who is my favorite Chinese Southern Belle. Total in-joke, sorry.)

You know, when it’s the year 2019 and we’re watching an old white lady with her six Asian looking teenagers on the twelfth season of Kate Plus 8, and our currently non-existent children look up to us to ask, “Daddy, why do those kids look Asian,” we’ll be able to look them in the eye and explain to them that a long time ago, there was a time when their daddy was still on the show; before he started wearing Ed Hardy and became a complete douchebag. Or not.

I didn’t grow up on sweet red beans and shaved ice, so the dessert looks a little intense to even me, but at what point does someone’s objections to food start getting offensive? Another commenter put it best: “There’s an interesting dichotomy in the comments. This stuff is delicious, but I kind of feel like I do when they use ‘weird and crazy’ Asian food on Fear Factor after reading [these] comments.” Balut, anyone?