• Takuma

    Sounds familiar, I was one of those who were bullied in high school. From what I remember…I was mostly made fun of because of my name. Or for being asian. Quite a few emasculating insults thrown about too. Things never did look up back then and even now I am slow to see the good intentions people have.

    I suppose I can also thank those jerks for one thing…I hate discrimination and it is part of the reason I post here and read other AA blogs. It just makes me rage internally if that makes any sense.

    I especially hate the stereotypes about Asian guys like myself and wish they would just end. I however do not claim that would fix anything for me. I am part of the problem and I can’t really blame anybody but myself.

  • moye

    @Takuma How are you a part of the problem?

  • Takuma

    @moye As in I kinda fit into the whole nerdy Asian guy who is bad at social interactions. A bit insensitive with comments in general. I don’t really take active time in trying to change much either. I just study, wear comfortable clothes, and generally spend my time with nerdy but fun hobbies. Maybe I am the only one who sees it as a problem b/c of the walking stereotype.

  • VanCityNights

    Asian Canadians don’t get bullied. Hint to the Americans, you gotta act gangster. Have a heatscore, like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGRoyOcjoIQ&feature=channel_video_title

  • VanCityNights

    Asian Canadians don’t get bullied. Hint to the Americans, you gotta act gangster. Have a heatscore, by: 1. Wearing lots of Ed Hardy/Affliction. 2. Wearing sunglasses wherever you go, even indoors. 3. Surround yourself with tons of other Asian guys with as high of a heat score. 4. Surround yourself with a lot of LGs (little girls) and Asian chicks with blonde highlights.

    Tutorial:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGRoyOcjoIQ&feature=channel_video_title

  • Takuma

    @VanCityNights I dunno about that but I heard my cousins were pretty much fine in Canada. I don’t think that style prevents the problem though :P.

  • dcj125

    Just tell the bully that you’re going to shoot up the school or kill him. But only say it once and only say it to the bully. And then when the bully brings it up to the authorities, deny it tooth and nail (but make sure there’s no evidence) and then tell them that you’re being bullied and that the bully is continue his harassment. Let’s see who they’ll believe – the meek Asian kid with presumably good grades, or the bully that skips school and whose parents are never around? It’s the best kind of revenge!

    I’m fortunate enough to say that I wasn’t bullied in high school, but I think I went to a Catholic, private school that didn’t have intolerant students. My friends who went to public high school are a little bit more jaded.

  • moye

    @Takuma I’m not a bullying expert or a psychologist by any mean but I think your comment was bordering into victim blaming. I don’t think your personality and preferences was ever part of the problem. There’s no excuse for anyone to be harassed, especially based on manners and social interactions.Let’s be honest: there’s always a part of us that fits into a stereotype. I do things that are “so typical” of APA women that others often make fun of but that doesn’t mean I’m allowed to be mocked or bullied for it. It’s who I am.

    So if you like to study, wear sweatpants and do nerdy things, enjoy it because that’s who you are. I see no reason in changing oneself so you don’t fit in a perceived stereotype when it’s totally okay to be like that.

    Okay, I’ll stop being so preachy. Sorry. That was annoying.

  • 15rounder

    I’m a 5th generation Filipino American. The only time I wa ever bullied was by a Korean guy who hated Filipinos.

  • Takuma

    @moye ah sorry guess I should have thought a bit more before posting it is just that the article made me remember hs. By part of the problem I meant to convey that if I want to speak out against Asian male stereotypes…I should at the very least not participate in stereotypical stuff.

  • @15rounder I’ve been bullied by East Asian kids who hated Filipinos too >=( And then crazy white supremacists in high school, and when I stood up for myself and smacked the shit outta the bully, was threatened with expulsion.

    These were the days when you’d actually be physically hurt, not bullied on Facebook or any online outlet.

    I would never, ever, EVER go to my high school reunion for that reason. Bullying really does significant damage to a person.

  • A_Lee

    This is not a politically correct answer, but it is effective.

    1. Evaluate the situation. If the bully is actually dangerous (i.e. capable of criminal violence), or part of a large group of bullies, just alert whatever authorities you need to, and try to stay away. There is nothing else you can do. If its just your average bully, then proceed to the following steps.

    2. Learn verbal quickness. Bullies are generally insecure, so identify what they are insecure about and ruthlessly exploit it. Bullies aren’t at the top of the food chain, because the ones at the top don’t need to bully to get what they want. It’s the social climbers that bully. Every bully does it for a reason, find that reason.

    3. Be prepared for a physical fight. If you’ve done #2, the bully can’t humiliate you, because you should be the one humiliating him if he tries to taunt you. His can either stop or try to physically intimidate you. When that happens, don’t back down. Force him to initiate violence. When that happens, try to defend or just back away while continuing to laugh and humiliate him verbally. You want him to be mad, while you remain calm. Rinse and repeat, until people are generally aware of the situation and authorities step in.

    4. If the authorities don’t step in, there is nothing you can do. Don’t fight back, even if you know you could win decisively. It’s not worth it, you want to have a future and a career.

  • Thanks for this post…I think it’s important, especially since a disproportionately high number of Asian American women end up being depressed compared to others — and I suspect that among students, Asian-Ams are among the worst when it comes to that. I know of far too many Asian-Am students who have attempted or committed suicide. There was even a recent article about Pvt. Danny Chen, who either was murdered or committed suicide after being regularly harrassed and bullied by his superiors. This shit needs to stop.

  • mwei

    @ErikaHarada why’s everybody assuming bullies are males? I’m sure female on female hazing happens pretty often too.

  • mwei

    @Bunni was he a East European white supremacist?

  • mwei

    @Takuma nothing wrong with being good at math. it’s the fault of the occidental media for excluding and not making Asians cool on shows like “Numb3rs”

  • Phantom

    This post and some of the comments assume that the bullying is (primarily) interracial. Is it? If so, what’s the break down on who bullies who (e.g., making this up — 80% of blacks who are bullied report that they were bullied by Asians)?

    The linked article does not give any data re. this question. As a matter of fact, it closes with,

    “A number of Asian countries have also wrestled with bullying.

    Japan stepped up measures in 2006 after at least four youngsters killed themselves in a matter of days and the education minister said he had received an anonymous letter from a bullied student who was contemplating suicide.”

    Presumably — since I can’t think of a single Asian country that allows/promotes/encourages other races to immigrate the way America does — those Asians getting bullied in “a number of Asian countries” are being bullied by fellow Asians. So the bullying may not be because of foreign accents, physical appearance, “funny names,” strange food, etc. While its motivation may vary by country, it is ultimately a problem of the heart, and is thus not amenable to legislative “fixes.” It requires a change of heart, and that is the province of religion, not civil government.

    BTW I don’t believe in imitating thug/”gangsta” culture is the way to go. I’m all for cranking up the death penalty ( http://www.cjlf.org/ and http://www.nypost.com/p/news/opinion/opedcolumnists/item_S38BIwKCpB87lF74df5eFM;jsessionid=5CF6667EB6B171D311BEDF93E5E227A9 ) and for Shall Issue concealed carry ( http://www.nraila.org/Issues/FactSheets/Read.aspx?id=18&issue=003 and http://www.gotcarry.org ), because I think those destructive thugs are the ones who should be living in fear of the rest of us. We, not they, should be respected and held in esteem by our youth. Gangstas should be seen as fools pursuing a suicidal path. Instead, our kids are committing suicide because they are being preyed upon by those scum.

  • Elliott

    @[email protected] regardless of whether or not you embody so-called asian stereotypes, you should not have been bullied. you are fully in your rights to behave as you are, as you wish. that doesn’t entitle others to make fun or or physically intimidate you.

  • moye

    @mwei where does @ErikaHarada insinuate that most bullies are male?

  • Takuma

    @moye @mwei @ErikaHarada I assume it is entailed as part of the definition of a bully (linguistics) not necessarily true. Although when it comes to AA female depression or just depression in the AA community in general. It usually would have more to do with the images of what is good looking as shown by media. This is my observation but I have never seen a girl who is Asian being directly bullied(verbal insults/racist remarks etc.)…usually in the younger crowd they SEEM accepted. Again, observation which may or may not be true.

  • Takuma

    @mwei Not good at complicated math more of a geek/gamer who still enjoys watching Anime from time to time (no time now, college). But when I do play games/MMOs I tend to play by numbers/efficiency of effort to benefit. (If I lost you that’s ok).

  • mwei

    it was just convenient to type in the reply box after the thought crossed my mind reading the rest of this thread and others…

  • mwei

    @Takuma didn’t JohnL recently had an article where his daughter was sorted of picked on?

    there are undoubtedly many other factors causing mental health issues… they’re just beginning to delve into these issues after the 2010 census with Asians being the highest increase of population…

  • Takuma

    @mwei ah john locke. It took me a sec to think of what jk stood for. True there are some cases but I guess I don’t notice any locally.

  • @mwei No, he was some Irish dude. I mean, his last name was Fitzgerald and he was the star quarterback on the football team.On that note, fuck North Orange County. Right in the ear. I’m pretty sure most of those predominantly white cities in North OC were founded by Klansmen.

  • mwei

    Fullerton is out of control. I know a former homeless guy there who was beaten up by Officer Ramos. >_<

  • @mwei I remember that incident, and that made me not want to hang out in Fullerton anymore. Shoot, I recall when Scott Dekraai shot up Salon Meritage in Seal Beach, people in that area initially thought it was a BLACK or BROWN person who went on that rampage. They were totally shocked it was a white guy. I’m sorry, but something in the water ain’t clean in the North OC… I went to Los Alamitos High, and in my 4 years there, 5 high profile murderers were found to be current students or alumni. And they were all white.

  • The challenge facing Asian-American children in America’s schools is that American culture is geared towards normalizing negative attitudes, and hence negative behaviour, towards Asian people. Most popular media depictions of Asian people are derogatory, and it is normal to see popular and influential celebrities casually mocking Asian people.

    Yet, while it is true that most people overcome their experiences of having been bullied and are able move past it, the real problem is that America’s children grow up with the experience that it is normal, acceptable, and sometimes even appropriate, to behave in racist ways towards Asians.

    Furthermore, bullying aside, the casual use of mocking of accents, racist gestures that belittle Asian racial characteristics, as well as verbal racial baiting, are commonly experienced by Asian children. Again, our kids may move past this, but we are still left with generations of white, black, and Hispanic kids, who grow into adulthood with the notion that this type of behaviour is normal and acceptable. This can only conribute to negative attitudes and behaviours towards the Asian minority.

    The issue goes beyond simple child-on-child bullying, and provides us with an an acute insight to the degree to which anti-Asian feeling is propagated and accepted in American culture.

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  • gimirzz

    @Takuma @moye @mwei @ErikaHarada I’m an Asian female and I don’t think gender has any effect on racist attitudes and bullying because of it. I’m pretty sure females are bullied too even if it’s just subtle bullying

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  • nathanyu1993

    im asian and what ive gotta say is that asians should work out more..and cahnge their diet plans less ricce more meat and proteins so you can pack on some weight and defend yourselves..here in canada asians donet get bullied and when we do its one on one for me..one on two works good for me too..but from where i set foot asians are scarce but strong

  • nathanyu1993

    and also instead of taking kung fu i think most asians should resort to muay thai and brazilian ju jitsu..most ppl in Hong Kong have been taking up kick boxing or muay thai already..they just need ju jitsu and theyre set

  • dcj125

    @nathanyu1993 I totally agree dude…My New Year’s resolution was to get stronger to defend myself. I started taking steroids a week ago and it’s already kicking in…I’m still not heavy enough though so I’m just wearing oversized clothes and ankle weights…and then I took muay thai a few years ago but it was too much work and didn’t make sense to put in all that time and effort when I could be doing more awesome things so I just bought a glock and carry that around instead when peeps look at me in the eyes I just pull my piece and they back off. I’m so strong and cool because I don’t use punctuation correctly…

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  • Nicokinko

    Yeah, it certainly is interesting(and upsetting) that Asian-American kids experience the most racial bullying. Not just bullying in general but bullying specifically BECAUSE they’re of Asian descent.  I mean if you put it into perspective, it’s much rarer to see say, a black kid being picked on solely for being black then to see that with an Asian kid. Hell, it even happens in sunny, liberal California where I grew up. This may sound far-fetched but it all boils down to the mainstream American perception of Asians being foreign, different, alien, and dare I say, sub-human, even. Hence, people question whether or not we have peripheral vision, feel free to mock us at every turn(while biting their tongues about any other racial group) and are genuinely surprised when we speak flawless English. I’ve actually heard the words “alien” and “different” being used to describe Asians far more than towards any other race. This all happens for a number of different reasons, primarily due to the ones stated by Ben Ef. 

  • Don’t become a victim. Hello? All ethnic groups look different and act different. We aren’t the only ones with funny accents or eat weird food. Respect and consideration is part of our culture. Sorry to say it, but it isn’t in other cultures. Bullies come from very difficult and disadvantaged homes. They treat others the way they are treated. It gets really messy if the bully has gang affiliations or act like it. However if it is your run of the mill bully, stick up for the person or get the appropriate persons involved. There is security in numbers. Just do something about it. Don’t be a glutton for punishment. Learn martial arts or something.

    What I can’t understand is how the heck people are bullied online?

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  • YourHusband

    asians that get bullied are usually the unattractive, nerdy ones. this is the case in both canada and US. good looking asians are seen as superior to most white people in US

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