The 5 Types Of Asian American Expats In Asia You Don’t Want to Be

By Johnny C | Tuesday, July 17, 2012 | 14 Comments

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hk The 5 Types Of Asian American Expats In Asia You Don’t Want to Be

There are some times when I’m happier being amongst my Third Culture Kid crowd than I am amongst the Asian American crowd. Having grown up in Manila and Hong Kong, spent extended time in Bangkok and Singapore, and now currently working in Jakarta, every time I head over to a bar or hear an American accent, I usually turn my head in their direction. If it comes from an Asian American (after confirming they aren’t fellow TCKs), I take extra care to make sure they don’t fit into one of the five types of Asian American Assholes in Asia I want to avoid.

I’m not saying that all Asian Americans act this way, having friends both local and expat in the above cities, we all ended up having frighteningly parallel descriptions of the types of Americans we’ve encountered in Asia whom we just can’t stand. I may be American, but I’m happy that I look ambiguous enough to pass off as a local anywhere in Southeast Asia (aside from my hair), and a hell of a lot happier when I’m the only American in a group because the usual impression they have of other Americans is negative, a sentiment shared by most of the world (often rightly so).

Granted, a lot of this negative behavior isn’t distinctly Asian American (let alone American), but there is an extra layer of negativity that people have because they see a face that looks like them acting like an idiot and presuming impunity for being foreigners who can hide their foreignness because they look like the locals. Other expats have reputations for doing similar things too, but what the hell: if we can avoid being idiots, then we can distinguish ourselves in a more positive light.

Compiled from e-mails, MSN Messenger conversation archives, bar counter rants, and airplane conversations, the following is a list of the types of Asian Americans in Asia that you should avoid being like.

The Hedonist in Heat: This is known as the international version of the “what happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas” attitude that inspires fear and loathing amongst locals. In Bangkok, Manila, or Bali, you can drink enough to make your liver hate you until the day you die. The Hedonists in Heat gather in an orgy of decadence and depravity, drinking from dusk till dawn, looking for the next shag, and may even embark on psychedelic drug trips because the wide availability of LSD makes the sunsets in Bali explode into a rainbow whale carcass dancing on the ocean horizon. Most of these are guys, but girls are notorious for getting drunk and yelling in the streets looking for fellow expats to sleep with after vomiting on the dance floor. Not distinctly Asian American, and definitely not just Americans, but Asian Americans should avoid being the Hedonist in Heat because of the audacity of assumed impunity for being able to hide a lot more easily than non-Asian-looking foreigners is as tasteful as bile in your esophagus. Usually found in bars and clubs, though not necessarily conscious.

The Self-Righteous and Self-Important Sanctimonious Turd: Typically a college student who took a course or two in ethnic studies and has this “I see things as they really are but nobody else does” self-important bullshit attitude. Typically goes to developing countries, lectures expats about their ignorance, wants to make a documentary about issues that they don’t have a clue about how much they still don’t know, and writes about how everyone is ignorant in their blogs. Usually categorizes everyone else who doesn’t share his or her worldview as being the Hedonist in Heat. Unsurprisingly, the Sanctimonious Turd sees the world only in black and white. Best quote from one of the turds we met: “I have more life experience than most people and I got it all in high school”. Usually found in Internet cafes sulking about the injustice of life when not in the company of friends (they have none).

The Burning Sphincter of Stupidity: The whole “white on the inside, yellow or brown on the outside” description doesn’t even begin to describe this breed of moron. How they reproduce is a mystery, but we suspect they must spawn from the putrid fetor found in the toilets of such places like Bangkok’s Soi 11 and various squat pits. They hate their own race and pretend not to speak the language, especially if in the country of their ethnic heritage. The Burning Sphincter of Stupidity says classy things like “Don’t talk to me in that language, I’m American and I speak English!” which is why they are sphincters, because nothing but horse shit comes out of these assholes’ gaping maws. Usually found looking in the direction of the nearest airport and counting down days to when they get out.

The Expat Bubble Airhead: though not overtly negative and offensive to locals as the previous three, the denizens typically stay amongst other expats and go to foreign hangouts; usually bars, beaches, clubs, restaurants, and malls; prefer to go to Starbucks and TGI Fridays, and complain about not having many friends due to the transitory nature of expats. In other words, they don’t have any local friends, and they only look for fellow English-speaking expats, oftentimes those of the same nationality. Might not have the closest relationship with locals, but there’s a noticeable distance they keep from them. They are likely to be e-mailing Australian surfers they meet during a weekend excursion than someone whom they work with all summer during an internship who’s local. Basically no different than someone who reads or watches National Geographic and Discovery Channel because of the distance they keep between themselves and local cultures. Usually found in McDonald’s, Starbucks and other similar international venues, because they see it as the last bastion of the familiarity and comfort of home.

The Quisling Exile: This is the type of Asian American who snaps and says “To hell with America!” and falls in love with life in Asia, whether or not it’s the country of their ethnic heritage, and tries to live there while completely distancing themselves from America. Though they may get along fine with locals and might even be considered an honorary one, the Quisling usually is embarrassing because of their animosity at their fellow compatriots. Spends his or her time decrying the stupidity of their previous country while failing to realize that they still live differently than a true local in their current country of residence due to their expat privilege. Usually found when you’re not looking for them.

[Photo courtesy of here.]

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Areeba_1

OMG! I am a little bit of the “Self-Righteous and Self-Important Sanctimonious Turd” in the regard that I want to make a documentary on something I don’t know shit about . Also, I do sulk about the injustices of life when on the internet (but I do have friends though). This has been an interesting read!
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KAMIKAZIPILOT

Fair enough assessment and I have to agree with a lot of it. But to be fair next time why don’t you do a piece about 5 types of locals in Asia who give a bad name to their fellow countrymen/women due to their treatment of asian americans. For starters how about third culture kids (maybe you) who automatically think they’re better than asian americans because they have a more diverse experience living in various countries. Or how about the local who bends over backward to a white expat but when faced with the same situation from an AA expat treats them with hatred and distain. Just something to think about. The door swings both ways.
http://twitter.com/heyitsjohnnyc Johnny C

A few things to clarify: firstly, I don’t think I’m better than Asian Americans, and I certainly do believe many TCKs act pretty stupid (many times a lot more)–the expat bubble airhead stereotype is more notorious for TCK people, something I hoped readers would pick up on since it was backhanded and self-deprecating. But let’s just call this an attempt that was lost, going over the heads of some who didn’t catch it, and a good reminder that I need to improve the writing so it’s easier to pick up next time.

Secondly, I’m actually already doing a follow-up on the locals who do flag-sucking toward expats, thanks for mentioning it though. Funny thing is, I’ve actually seen them suck up to Asian Americans simply because they’re American. Black, White, Asian, Latin–I’ve seen people suck up to foreigners regardless, and I’ve seen the type you describe who treat Asian Americans/Australians/Canadians/Brits with disdain for being “traitors” as they say.

In any case, this was written in the Bali airport at the height of my disdain toward foreigners from America to Australia to Korea, being decadents who vomited in the airport because it was cheaper to get cleaned there by staff instead of having to pay for damages in the hotel rooms, which they thought was funny, and by a local who was looking on Couchsurfing to make friends with foreigners so she’d have a free place to stay in America because she had no friends in Jakarta (probably for good reasons, too).

Yes, the door swings both ways: locals and foreigners have their moments of lunacy, and I am not above this because of moving between continents and cultures. Thanks for sharing, captain.
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KAMIKAZIPILOT

I look forward to your next article about the different types of locals. In my experience locals in Asia tend to judge you first on the color of your skin even if they already know your nationality. I mean many treat me fairly but those who do judge make judgements on skin color before nationality. Many look at me strange when I speak english, especially outside of the large cities where there are many foreigners. I don’t really mind that though, it kind of makes me feel special.
I’ve never really felt anyone treat me better because I was an American. I’ve seen far more instances where a white person, regardless of nationality was treated better than the locals. I think that’s what is most disturbing. I personally think most locals in Asia are naive when it comes to foreigners. They are too influenced by the media and believe everything foreign (ex. western) is better. Many have a severe inferiority complex towards white foreigners. This is one reason that despite China’s rise on the world stage, it will never come close to resembling the world leader that the US is today. That said, I welcome the rise of China. It’s better for asians around the world.
http://twitter.com/heyitsjohnnyc Johnny C

Ha ha, I wouldn’t go THAT far to say it would be better for Asians around the world with China’s rise; I’d say it might actually make it WORSE for some Asians, looking at how the Chinese see themselves in comparison to the different Southeast Asians and their conflicts with them (the Paracel Islands is one example), bickering with Indians, and the resentment in African countries where there’s lots of Chinese investment. All of these issues might warrant more articles, but I’d probably submit that to policy journal where it might be more appropriate.

But yes: there’s a dismissive attitude toward foreigners of Asian descent, though in some scenarios, this changes if they’re seen as friends of local rich kids. Case in point: there was this dumb Australian Filipina in Manila who people were being cordial to but keeping a noticeable distance from, but as soon as her friends came–those from a wealthy top ten family–, there was this IMMEDIATE change in tone to suck up to her.
KAMIKAZIPILOT

I respectfully disagree with you statement about China’s rise. While there would still be problems, overall it would be better for the asians around the world. Our disagreement stems from our different upbringing. In the US, most non-asians don’t differentiate between the different asian ethinicities as long as they look fairly similar. Japanese/Koreans/Chinese are all the same. So if China were more powerful it would portray a more powerful image of asians around the world, regardless if they were Chinese or not. Also, despite the fact that CHina has conflicts with various asian countries, compare that to the war-mongering US and you can easily see that China is far more peaceful and tolerant than the West (at least the US). Who has fought more wars and brought about more deaths worldwide with their foreign policy in the last 50 years? China or the US? While it would be far from perfect, I would rather China be the world’s dominant power than the US.

Yes economic standing does play a role in how you’re treated, but IMO skin color, at least on first impression is the biggest factor. Those are just my experiences and I can see how others could have different experiences.
http://twitter.com/heyitsjohnnyc Johnny C

I agree. People do look at skin color and the similarities between the different Asian ethnic groups has led to cases like Vincent Chin, sadly. Yep, I don’t see many Chinese living the hedonist lifestyle as Americans do or portraying that image in entertainment, but I still see at the very least a resentment toward power-holders and the association, such as how in the Philippines Chinese beef is cheaper than local-grown that leads to silent resentment, or how in 1998 the riots and pillaging in Jakarta against Chinese for being perceived to have money that harkens back to Dutch times. Though as you said, it comes from our different perspectives, and I both definitely and sincerely appreciate yours.

Personally, I don’t like one big superpower, whether it’s China or America; mainly because Southeast Asia has its problems with China disregarding international waters and claiming it as Chinese, all the way up to the borders of Vietnam, Malaysia, the Philippines, and others. I’m more welcoming of a multilateral world kept in stalemate rather than one or two titans duking it out.

But I digress: we’re talking culture rather than politics, and in response, there will be those who appreciate and respect the Chinese (or at least those who look Chinese) for the power they have the same way some respect Americans now, just as there will also be those who harbor resentment toward China’s hegemony as there is for American’s hegemony.
KAMIKAZIPILOT

I also don’t like one big superpower, I’d rather have multiple world powers. I guess the best hope right now is a world where there are groups of powerful nations organized into different factions (like the Cold War with the US and Soviet groups). Hopefully, like you mentioned, the different powers will keep each other in check. Agree with you last paragraph, there will never be a time when everyone is happy, it’s just the nature of civilization. If one group is in power, it always seems like another group is being oppressed.
zdrav

I agree with KamikaziPilot in that the rise of China is good for the rest of Asia, at least in terms of finally stopping Euro-worship.

One thing that disturbs me as a Korean is when Koreans look down on Chinese. I used to do it as a kid when I was growing up in North America because it made me feel okay at being Korean. A lot of the kids made of Chinese kids and culture, but they told me that I was cool because I was Korean, and I thought that that was a compliment. I internalized all the racist stereotypes against Asians (cheap, dirty, hive-minded, etc.) and told myself that they didn’t apply to me because I was KOREAN, and that they only applied to those Chinese Others.

I didn’t realize at the time that I was accepting and promoting anti-Asian racism. Nobody outside of Asia cares to distinguish between the East Asian ethnicities, and it’s an Asian conceit to believe that non-Asians truly appreciate the differences among us.

However, with China starting to become not only an economic leader but also a cultural and political one, I think Asians will start to take more pride in their heritage because China was/is such a dominance influence in East Asia.

When I entered college, I only wanted to study abroad and travel to Europe. When I saw that a lot of non-Asian kids wanted to go to Hong Kong and Shanghai and Beijing, it made me rethink my prior overvaluing of Europe.

I’ve been to Europe now, and I’ve sort of been to China. I find China much more exciting.
KAMIKAZIPILOT

Sometimes asians have a “crabs in a bucket” mentality, which results in us fighting amoung ourselves instead of cooperating with each other and working toward a common goal. Your story is all too familar, not to myself personally, but what I’ve heard. I can’t really blame you for your actions as a kid, I mean if I were in your same situation there’s a good chance I’d do the same thing. After all, being a kid is all about fitting in and finding your place.
It’s a credit to you that you’re aware of the obstacles asians face and how racism is involved. Being of Japanese descent, it also bothered me when any asians were putting down other asians because of their ethnicity. I mean to do it in fun is okay, but to do it maliciously is wrong. Hopefully Asia can take a cue from Europe in improving its ethnic relations. After all, wasn’t it just a generation ago that France and England were at war with Germany. Now they’re all part of the European Union and seem to get along fine.
dementus666

While we’re being honest, I haven’t been back to the old country, but if I did, I would be a self-righteous turd. I’m not saying this to be abrasive, but if I’m a duck, while I can pretend to be a chicken, most people will see right through it and know that I’m a duck.
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