Dim Sum Disaster on Top Chef All-Stars

If you’ve ever wanted to watch an entire cast of Top Chef crash and burn, then throw them into a Chinese restaurant, force them to cook dim sum and then serve it all to a crowd of non-English speaking Chinese families.

This week’s episode of Top Chef All-Stars featured two very special challenges: the Quickfire test gave Head Judge Tom Colicchio a chance to demonstrate his own culinary speed skills before the contestants (SO COOL) while the Elimination Challenge with guest judge Susur Lee had the remaining contestants attempt to successfully cook dim sum and dole them out in a timely manner (aka fast) to the hungry residents of New York City’s Chinatown. Oh, and it was during the lunch rush hour, too. Sounds easy, right?

I was excited to see Asian cuisine as a focus for the Elimination Challenge. The last episode, New York’s Finest, featured Korean American Chef David Chang (of Momofuku fame) as a guest judge, where some of the “cheftestants” had to emulate his style of cooking in his Ma Peche kitchen, but imitating the restaurant of a celebrated Asian American chef is one thing. Having to deal with a roomful of Chinese dim sum eaters is a whole other issue. SPOILER ALERT, after the jump:

I loved how the Top Chef competitors were completely stumped when it came to putting together a dim sum dish, shopping at a Chinese market and–if things couldn’t get any more complicated–working in the Chinese restaurant kitchen, where even (as Fabio discovered) the ovens wouldn’t heat above 300 degrees. Clearly, cooking conventional Chinese food is very different from putting together delicate, gourmet plates of foie gras confit with yuzu infused gelee or whatever. No one spoke English in the market, the kitchen was ill prepped and the chefs were required to dream up an original dim sum dish–not, as the judges said themselves, a take on basic American Chinese food. Dim sum also requires organized, efficient cooking: food must be cooked and delivered swiftly in mass quantities. Where else do those carts over laden with egg custard tarts and shrimp dumplings come from? From some of the places I’ve eaten in the past, I’d say heaven.

The outcome of the Elimination Challenge was anything but that; the chefs seemed completely over their head in organizing their team, from cooking and plating their individual plates to pushing them out to the increasingly annoyed guests and an increasingly annoyed viewer (me). Dudes, come on. Haven’t you ever eaten dim sum before? Those Chinese cooks could care less about how many basil leaves are placed in each spring roll. Just slap those scallop dumplings on a plate and be done with it! But the challenge did make for some great TV: did I ever think I’d watch a table of angry Chinese women grab food off a dim sum cart on Bravo television? Probably not and it was pretty amazing. Even Angelo, who I expected to rise up to the challenge thanks to his taste for all things Asian, seemed to disappear in the chaos. Dude, come on. We saw you almost wet your pants in Singapore last season. Shouldn’t you be embracing this Chinese cuisine? You know how I feel about Angelo but even he disappointed me.

Not surprisingly (because I’m totally biased like that) Dale earned the top prize with his winning dish of sticky sweet rice with Chinese bacon, marking his second win of the season and my full blown fanaticism. Just kidding. Kind of. Is he like the best chef ever? Like, totally. Did his experience in a dim sum restaurant led to his victory? Sure. Did I find it appropriate that the one Asian American cheftestant on the show won the dim sum challenge? Um, YEAH. It’s like watching the other Asian student in your class win the math award. CAUSE THAT’S HOW WE ASIANS ROLL, BABY. *fist pump to empty air*Anyway, now I’m craving dim sum. Who wants to go with me?

Next week: Dale unveils his Asian rage against that annoying guy with the poofy hair. I can’t wait!

(Screencap photo: Videogum’s Blog Entry of the Top Chef Chinatown Episode)

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About Moye

I am a Japanese-American girl who was born, raised and is most probably stuck in traffic right this second in Los Angeles. I'm currently one of the co-editors of 8Asians and like to distract myself with good food, reading long books, playing video games, catching up on celebrity news, choosing my new new haircut and then writing all about it on Hello Moye and sometimes here on Twitter if I can get it in under 140 words or less. You can reach me at moye[at]8asians.com.
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