I was intrigued when I first read Jennifer’s post over at Mixed Race America on things we avoid just to avoid perpetuating a stereotype. For example, when you’re at the food court in the mall, do you avoid going to the Asian food stands, because it would help perpetuate the stereotypes that Asians eat rice (and other Asian foods)?
I bring up that specific example, because when I went to college in Philadelphia, my roommate, Phil, whose family was local, invited me to dinner one night. His mom was Italian-American, and his family has been in the U.S. for a few generations. Phil warned me before we got to his house that his mom had made rice for dinner, as she didn’t know what else to make for a Chinese guy (it didn’t matter that I’ve been in the U.S. since I was 2, and she’s met me and knew I spoke English with a perfect Long Island accent). Phil’s girlfriend, Val, at the time was African-American, and Phil’s mom prepared fried chicken whenever Val went to dinner at their house, so I guess I shouldn’t have been offended. (And I was plenty happy to have rice for dinner, since I was a poor college student living on mac and cheese.)
Speaking of not doing something just because it would perpetuate a stereotype, Jennifer (of Mixed Race America) brings up the example of not wearing a cheongsam at her wedding, because she didn’t want to perpetuate the stereotype of her being “Suzie Wong”. I do catch myself sometimes thinking I shouldn’t order “oriental chicken salad” and then do it anyway, just because I like mandarin oranges. There’s probably dozens of other examples just like that. And then sometimes I do things just to completely be opposite of a stereotype. My entire career and profession is sort of a reaction to the Asian stereotype. My parents wanted me to be an engineer, but I followed a career path to become a marketing executive. Instead of being meek, quiet, and hard-working at my desk in a cubicle farm, I go out and give presentations, talk loudly at work functions, and meet and greet customers.
This topic gets more difficult when I try to apply this to my four year old daughter. I want her to learn about her culture and heritage, even if it means perpetuating stereotypes, because it’s too easy to lose sight of where you’re from as an Asian American. I want my daughter to wear a cheongsam at her wedding and to consider it a part of who she is, rather than what it makes her appear to be.
The question remains whether as a society we’re ready to see people for who they are or are we helping to perpetuate stereotypes when we do things that are really just who we are?
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I think that's the entire point of the post. Sometimes we stop and wonder whether something we do can perpetuate a stereotype; but we should have enough self-esteem to do it anyway. I'm sorry Jennifer at Mixed Race America didn't feel comfortable enough to wear a cheongsam at her wedding, but I'm going to make sure my own daughter is.
Oh come on you guys; it's one thing to want to overthrow stereotypes, it's entirely another to adjust your behavior for fear of what stereotypes it might perpetuate. Why do we, as individuals living in an already diverse country, need to be afraid of what "other people might think"?
Call me insensitive, but I think us Asian American folk need to man up and stop being pushed around by stereotypes either toward or against them. Do whatever the heck you want, be proud and be yourself. It's a downright insult to think that I should *not* eat rice because it might make other "white" ppl think that it's all we eat.
If not racist, it's definitely stereotyping you. BTW, even though I'm Asian American; I had the same thing happen to me the first time I went back to Taiwan. My aunt invited me to lunch with her kids, and took me of all places, to Hardee's in Taipei (this was the 1980's). She was afraid that hamburgers were the only things I would eat having grown up in the U.S.
I don't think it's sterotyping or "racist."
Some people in Vietnam assume I eat hamburgers and french fries every day (yes, I'm white). Is that "racist?" I don't think so.
It's not racist that someone thinks "what might someone enjoy for dinner", but it's racist to think that's the only thing they'd be willing to eat based on their culture/background. The conversation was more like: "my mom has no idea what to serve you other than rice, since she thinks you won't eat anything else she makes".
@mifocals: It depends on the situation. Where appropriate, yes I try to change the stereotype. But if there's any possibility of physical harm, then no.
Is it bad that I kind of "get" the "friend chicken/rice" thing?
I understand that it does suggest that dude's mom is maybe a LITTLE sheltered when it comes to dealing with ethnic minorities.
But... I'm not really seeing any kind of "subtle racism based on ignorance."
I'm kind of thinking she's doing what... I probably do when people are coming over...
Asking myself, "Wonder what they'd enjoy having for dinner?"
Is it inherently racist to assume an Asian might be accustomed to/enjoy having rice with their meal?
I feel strange being half Asian, knowing that I interact with people using this same mentality all the time.
If I'm having lunch with white people... I just assume that someone, at some point, is going to say "Hey guys... How about Macaroni Grill?"
So, I guess... I'll answer the question with another question.
What do you call a stereotype that you readily embrace? If I wave my chopsticks in the air and say, "I'm Asian... and I LOVE rice," am I perpetuating a stereotype? Even if I'm being dead serious when I say it (honestly, I have no idea if that WOULD be considered "racially charged" on some level).
BTW, white people... Just STOP with the "Uncle Ben's," thing alright? I don't know who this "Uncle Ben" is or why he insists on calling his product rice... But that ain't like no rice I ever had before...
I feel like we had a field day with this image already. I remember saying how ironic it was that this poster was supposed to fight racism and they depict the Asian woman eating a bowl of rice with chopsticks (what a stereotype!).
Then someone argued that she was eating a salad with chopsticks... (which is still ridik!)
Or am I imagining this?!?!?!
I don't really care; I do whatever I like doing and if people think I'm being a stereotype, it's their problem for thinking so. :P The lady making fried chicken for black guests and rice for Asians is a little too nuts, though. Who the hell does that?!
I don't purposely avoid doing things (like eating rice) just so that I won't be perceived a certain way. If it's who I am or what I like doing, then that's that.
Do you speak up when someone pushes stereotypes onto you or makes sweeping generalizations about Asians? I posted on this yesterday - http://mifocals.wordpress.com/2010/03/10/no-eng... . I'd like to hear your thoughts.
Feb 16: Adam WarRock and Kirby Krackle: West Cost Tour Dates!!!
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