Hello Kitty Vibrators Being Sold as “Shoulder Massagers”

So when the first Hello Kitty vibrator um, shoulder massager came out about 10 years ago, I bought one as a gag gift for a friend of mine as a graduation present. She had no idea what it was because it looked like a really cute Hello Kitty toy. I then told her to turn it on. After giving me a WTF look, she did, and she turned 10 shades of bright red. Granted this was in front of my boyfriend, and her other closest lesbian friends, who naturally all wanted to know where I got it — and who all complained that the, um, vibrations were too weak to be really useful. Thankfully, she forgave me after realizing what it was, and we’re still good friends to this day.

Lo and behold, j-list.com has decided to bring back the Hello Kitty “shoulder massager”. as a set. Six of them. While I’m totally all for “shoulder massaging” and other ways of relieving stress, I can’t think of a single person who could go through six “shoulder massagers” in her (or his) lifetime. If you are one of those people, well… guess you don’t really need another person to keep yourself busy, do you? For them to massage your shoulders, of course.