So, the age-old question: Why do Asian girls go for white guys?
A friend (who happens to be Caucasian guy and married to an Asian American girl) asked if there really are more interracial couples than intra-racial couples out there. “Asian guys complain about all this interracial dating, but is it really all that common? Or are they just noticing the few interracial couples out there and making a big thing out of it?”
Hmm. So I did an informal poll amongst my friends and found that 27% of them are in interracial relationships, within all of which the girls are Asian American. They all happen to be in the San Francisco Bay Area too.
(BTW, his is a highly unscientific poll and really doesn’t mean squat, except to show that 27% of my friends are in interracial relationships. Do a poll amongst your friends. See what you get.)
(Also check out Why Asian Girls Go For White Guys: A Response and Why Asian Guys Can’t Get White Girls for more juicy coverage.)
So why do you think Asian girls go for white guys?
@man Oh my god… I hate you sooo much!!! I really hate you people! As a white male let me say to ANY Asian male reading this, we are not all PRICKS like the asshole who calls himself “man”. I really hate you because people with your personality are not just with Asian girls, there are white people like you with other types of girls (black, hispanic, middle eastern) that give white guys a bad name! Honestly go die in a hole, you are an embarrassment to our race!
@man @Asian_Brown_Eyes As much as I would like nothing more than “man” to choke on his own ego, I have to agree with him on berating girls and calling them stupid. Asian_Brown_Eyes man I get that your pissed but typing shit like that only makes people like “man” seem less like a prick.
@Ed WTF man? Are you trying to fill the douche void that “man” leaves when he doesn’t comment by making your own asshole remark?
Ugh, THIS shit AGAIN.
I date a Russian guy and HE was the one who found me. I tried really hard to blow him off many many MANY times, but he was so damn persistent! I really thought he was going to be a typical Asiaphile, but he wasn’t AT ALL! In fact, he’s more of a mash-up of Tim Wise, Andrew Zimmern, and Anthony Bourdain.
I have tried dating Asian guys. They’re very intimidated by me, since I am a pretty militant feminist and extremely opinionated. Also, I’m hapa (Pilipino/Spanish/Italian) so I’m not really stick thin and I’m tan…I’m kinda built like Snooki (short and kinda chunky) and most Asian guys expect their women to be coke-whore skinny. Not gonna happen with me, bub.
So, bitter Asian males……if you guys could GROW a couple, be more confident, and not impose unrealistic expectations on us, then maybe, JUST maybe, we’ll give you a chance.
Oh, and I hear you guys snarking on us APA girls calling us “batshit crazy”. You know, mental illness in our community is a real issue, and frankly, YOU’RE NOT HELPING. FUCK YOU.
@CrzySxyFangrl69 I think your handle says it all “Crzy”. Every post on here from a white guy or an asian girl blasts asian guys. And you are no different. I like how your argument is based on racist generalizations and stereotypes often perpetuated by surprise, surprise white guys and asian girls. There’s a reason why the rate of mental illness and STD are not so coincidentally highest among Asian Females. You figure it out. My issue isn’t necessarily with AF/WM because despite what is forced down the throat of North Americans through media, there are actually lots of AM/WF couples. My issue is that every where I turn Asian Females will take a White guy over and Asian guy and Asian guys will take a White girl over an Asian girl. All of these preferences are based on racial bias and racist influences. Most asian guys I know, and there are lots, are either dating or married to white girls.
Too many asian people nowadays will not date other asians. The Asian community is in a sad state, partially because they’re unaware of their own racial biases.
As for you as an individual, just maybe giving “bitter asian males” a chance? Don’t make me laugh. I’m pretty sure they’re happy with you not doing them any favors.
@Ed @CrzySxyFangrl69 You made a really good point there Ed – everyone always talks about the AF-WM thing, but no one really points out that the inverse is also true – many MANY asian males prefer dating white females over asian females. (i think i remember an article on 8asians in fact which was titled something like “why do hot asian guys prefer white girls”)
of course, asians out-group dating has a number of reasons, i’m sure many of them involving real love/like/common interests blah blah blah, but definitely at the other end of the spectrum, there are many who do it out of racial bias, culturally biased beauty standards, and internalized racism. i really just wonder why it is that the asian american community is so disproportionately affected by this.
You know there is an obvious reason asian american woman date white guys. There are simply more white guys to choose from so even if they are interested in dating Asian guys, finding one they are attracted to is harder. Let’s face it just because you are an Asian guy doesn’t automatically mean every Asian woman is going to be attracted to you. The same goes for us white guys. Just because we see a white girl doesn’t mean I can attract her. No matter what your mother told you, you are not that special, none of us are.
@jodscho I do like the outlook presented in your argument, however, unfortunately it isn’t that simple. Asians have the highest rates of out-marriages then any other visible minority and gender wise asian women are the highest in North America. If it were true that it’s just because there are more “white guys” around, then Black, Indian, Latin etc women would statistically have interracial marriages at around the similar rate of 50% but it’s not even close to that for these groups. Couple that with the obvious sexualization of asian females and parallel de-sexualization of asian males in media, the prevalent depiction of asian female and white male relationships despite there being much more (at least at one time) asian female and asian male relationships and the obvious but “afraid to admit” ubiquitous racial hierarchy of which white people and/or those with caucasian features are considered at the top, then you have what we have in North America. A sad state for asians and racial minorities in general where individuals from these groups subconsciously attach their own inferiority complexes to who they find attractive in mate.
@jodscho an asian man and an asian american man are two very different creatures. i can’t really speak to the mentality of an asian man raised in asia, but growing up an asian american and in an asian american community, your statement that white men are more open-minded and that asian men want pure virgins – please. asian AMERICAN males for the most part, are socialized in america and therefore they are pretty similar in sexual attitudes and norms with white american males. please get rid of the notion that you, as a more “open minded” white male, are somehow liberating us asian females from our sexually oppressive asian husbands and fathers.
i’ve lived in hong kong for awhile as well, where it is very very popular for hong kong chinese girls to date white men. i found that this was more often than not, a status thing. it’s like dating the guy with the nice fancy car, or the guy with the six figure income. hong kong still very much under a colonial mentality – that is, whatever is western aka white, is better. that’s why there is such a push to learn English, that’s why the vast majority of Hong Kongers want to live abroad (specifically, London), and that’s why dating a white man is especially appealing.
@WG “What white guys are really like?” Nice generalisation. You’re the racist one here.
Fuck you, your hypocrisy disgusts me. Way to be a cunt.
@davidhier @WG OMG the white guy is being generalised for once, Heaven forbid right??? You’ve disgusted me for a long time, I know your pyschology, your basic mindset and Your not fooling me or anyone who has a half functioning brain. 99pcercent of white guys are like it, now go back to your closed doors, in your house and say what most of you will never admit to in public.
@davidhier @WG racial generalizations are not okay to you, but i guess it’s perfectly alright to throw around vile misogynistic slurs? gee, you totally proved WG wrong – any asian girl would be lucky to date a guy like you.
I’m an asian american girl, chinese and thai mix. I’ve been dating a british white guy close to a year now. We’re both 24. We get all sorts of looks when we go out together but we don’t give a **** because we’re happy. Whats the big deal with skin colour? We’re both attractive and have no problems getting dates with people of our own race (and outside as well). To me, race doesn’t matter… It’s funny how some people just assume things for instance…”you must have incredible sex (because he’s white and your asian and bla bla bla”, “you like white guys huh?”…. I love him period. That is all I will say and oh…the sex is amazing because we make sure it is 😉
@WG Judging from the racism in your post, I would gather that you prefer a more overt style of racism? The kind where you drive around and pick someone up to beat on?
Most asian girls i know who dating white guys think they are white. That is pretty pathetic. Another one is most asian girls claims that they like white guy because of true love. LMFAO. To me they are stupid and dumb which mean not SMART.
If I am a asian girl, I will only date asian guy. I will be look the same and no different, either I date asian guy or white guy. If i date Asian guy, I will have more pride for my own. I won’t lose my own race which is great. My generation will be purely Asian which I should proud of. Also other race will respect me. If i date White guy, I will get the same love that asian guy give me. but I will have a small society because I can’t go to white society all the time with these Asian face. I can’t be or hang out with my own Asian people mostly. It is not good for both side. I believe White guy will feel the same way too. So, why don’t we just keep the environment healthy?
let say if you are white couple or asian couple, you can go anywhere you want. People will never complain about your relationship. How beautiful is that? right?
There is one reason good for white guy is asian men don’t kill white guy because WG dating AF. We Asian are not like White, example, WM will kill Black men because BLACK men stealing White Women. (KKK)? So, now you know WHO IS MORE DIRTY.
There are so many reason why asian girl and white man are together.
This topic is really big, because a lot of people concern about it, not only asian men.
anyway, My English is not so good. you might wanna complain me. Don’t be rule. I have my own language. I can speak your language and my own language. So, I am smart right?
I don’t think that this is true at all. I am white, my wife is Asian. My wife said when we were first dating that she did not like white men, but did have a preference to tall, large men. I have been speaking with some of my wifes sisters and cousins, not one of them said they ” prefer” white men, but were curious to see if we were different “down there”. As for white males preferring Asian women? Apart from Asians being more attractive, better mothers, great cooks, good house keepers, faithful, honest and more down to earth I have no idea. I think Asian culture has Superior family values compared to western culture ( in my experience anyway) and because of this Asian girls make better wives, better mothers for your kids. I would never date a western girl ever again if I were single.
based on many of my asian femail friends who are dating or have dated a white guy, i think, many of my friends find white guys physically more attractive (usually bigger than asian guys). Also, they think asian guys are still very conservative and what they expect from girls are still kind of old fashion. Oh I also very much agree with what Jobscho below mentioned on a sexual part too. Asian guys are still believed to be very much into super skinny girls, and pale asian women, which makes asian women feel more loved by other races just the way they are.
I’m a korean girl dating a white guy. In my experience a lot of the asian guys ive met have either been church goers, “gangster”, nerds, momma’s boys, or mildly sexist. definitely not saying that all asians are like this, but it certainly narrows the scope when choosing a mate. for fun i usually go out to “indie” shows, and i really cannot tell you the last time i saw an asian guy; my lifestyle tends to attract the white or latino guys (im from la), so my dating history is composed of those ethnicities. really, not all asian girls are superficial and money grubbing!!! i just play my cards in a game where im attracted to those who have similar interests and asian guys generally do not fit that equation. for physical attraction, to be completely honest, i prefer a really tall guy with facial hair= not an easy thing to pull of if you’re asian. also, i think it is exciting to date those outside of your race. i can relate to a korean guy about family values and traditions and talk for hours, but in the end im much more interested in someone who is culturally different from me.
still, it is silly to think that there is no one left for asian men. think about how big korean pop music or korean dramas are. i dont listen to/watch the stuff but i know soooo many asian and non-asian girls who go crazy over the guys. dont take out your anger on the fact that youre single on other interracial couples. dont play up the stereotype where asian guys are either too meek or too chauvinistic: chill out and be the best version of you you can be! be content that you are good at math and art (and every subject really :P), because what speaks to girls is honest confidence and charisma. we lap that shit up!
Hmmmm.. Where do I begin? …..Let me first ask why asian women on the internet find it necessary to regurgitate every stereotypical, archetype, generalization of asian men that exists in western society, frame it with “in my experience…” or “in my opinion…” and still expect it not to be racist and discriminatory?
The fact your from LA only reinforces your racist bias. You honestly can’t expect people to believe there are no Asian guys in that part of the country that fit your “type”, unless that type is a strong Caucasoid preference, which you should have said in the first place instead of adding all of this extraneous crap about personality and intelligence. I suspect the Latino guys you like look closer to Enrique Iglesias then George Lopez.
Asians are not a single monolithic culture. There are huge difference between South Asian, South East Asian and North East Asian cultures and even in an between countries in these regions. But this is a moot point isn’t it? As there are only certain cultures, from certain parts of the world that you are interested.
In short, your message essentially amounts to “I think Asian guys are ok, but White guys are better. Asian guys hang in there”. Hahahaha!
Your views, beliefs, actions, your very existence contributes to the white male hegemony. I like your attempt at delivering advice (laughable really) by repeating the canned, “girls dig confidence” argument, when in fact you still wouldn’t be interested in tall, indie guitar playing, confident, Asian guy with a goatee because ultimately he doesn’t look white. Nothing you’ve said is really of any benefit to Asian males. Word of advice, please do not try to help Asian men out again.
I think it would be a lot easier if you just admit that you are heavily influenced by white media and you believe white standard of the beauty should be the way to go. Let’s face it, in many cases it is all about the race when it comes to WM/AF couples. With a city full of other minorities, AFs just happened to be dealing WMs like 99% of the time when it comes to interracial relationships. You honestly gonna try to tell me that’s just coincidence? I think it would be a lot more believable if you just come out and say you just like white guys better because well, they look white.
@jussayin so simple, you Asian girls wanna be white. I m so sick of my own people going for another people. I don’t complain if a few, but at least 90% of them are dating white.
Think about if your mother. you kids are living with other people and give you nasty look. How will you feel about it?
My chinese girlfriend had always dated chinese guys and never even thought about dating a foreigner or non-chinese guy before we started dating. And I certainly didn’t go to france with the intention of finding a chinese girl. Just two exchange students, in france of all places, who were able to meet and connect due to a random bundle of circumstances. It just happened, pretty simple and uncomplicated.
I could, however, tell characteristics that she likes about me that none of her other boyfriends had, but I think that’s of little importance seeing as she had been in france for a whole year before me and was never attracted to any other white guys, with or without those characteristics.
I guess I just got lucky that she enjoyed my goofiness as much as I enjoyed being goofy.
@Wonwill Wow!! In 4 years since this post was originally published, your comment is the only one by either a white male or an asian female that didn’t project any white superiority complex or asian self-hate. Well done and good luck to both of you.
Ugh…asian women are the worst…it’s funny how white dudes think they’re the best.
@jussayin Yawn, asian guys get girls…in fact, last night i was in safeway and it was the short asian guys with the hot girls and the white dudes with the ugly girls. The hot girls were not asian by the way:)
@asiangal are you sure you get looks, or is that your ego giving you hallucinations?
@Bunni uh…I don’t think they even want you to give them a chance…=/
If you are interested in WMAF, this link is the grand collection on this topic:http://fafast.com/play?white+guys+asian+girls
I’m a Chinese Canadian and I have only dated White girls four of them in total, one in high school, three at UC San Diego (yes many of this combo here…Yellow Fever :)). When I was in high school I was attracted to Asian women and then slowly as I grew up I witnessed more and more interracial relationships between white men and asian women. having lived in NorCal for years and Hong Kong for several years I realised that this combination is very fascinating…sadly to say but because of this, i now am only attracted to White women…and yes I only date hot ones hands down. haha. Anyway…
I suspect much of this has to do with the historical colonialism –> orientalism and the white men domination over the Asian cultures. I have seen some really young Asian ladies with old White men…and sometimes the ladies can’t even speak English well enough to communicate. I mean…is this a social ladder? Of course there are very few ones out there that are truly in love. But my main attempt is: it is either a social ladder, to get into the “higher” class society, money, or a combination of these.
My friend who happens to be Korean American has only dated White men and she dated one of my close friends here in Uni and when one of her friends visited her she mentioned something similar to oh i’m done with white guys, i’m going to go for asians. It sounded as if they dated White men because of reasons other than…love.
But no I’m not sad or anything about this topic…I’m happy. Less Asian women and White men in the way…White girls here I come!
@suesue Go go go shallow woman. 🙂 cheap asian women…that’s why i go for white girls haha.