Those who talk to me on a regular basis know that I’ve spent far too much time sequestered at home satisfying my obsessive interest in culinary adventures by watching a crapload of Food TV.
And then you’ll hear me talk shit about Bobby Flay.
My husband thinks I dislike him because he wears a gold watch. He might be right.
Bobby Flay must have it in his contract that he’s not allowed to lose any notable battles of Iron Chef America but thankfully loses the occasional Throwdown. My bias against Bobby Flay comes from a long term resentment-filled grudge of seeing him on an episode of Iron Chef Japan where at the end of the battle he jumps up on his cutting board with his shoes on and was dressed down by Morimoto for being a shithead that doesn’t properly respect the sacred nature of his tools and profession as chef. Yo Morimoto, you and me, looking eye to eye.
So during Iron Chef America, I endlessly roll my eyes at Bobby Flay and overlay Alton Brown’s commentary with me shouting at the television:
“Ooh, let me create a tamale with that and… ummm, put mango salsa on that.”
“Let me guess: put a fucking chipotle ragu of some fucksauce on top of that.”
“Oh shit, let me guess — you’re going to put some fucking avocado cilantro aioli on that. Again.”
I’m so not a fan of him.
But I do admit that I enjoy watching him in Throwdown!. Why? Because the show exemplifies his douchiness. The concept of the show is this: Bobby Flay travels the country to try and show up regional experts in their various dishes of expertise. And it’s not like he even does the research or work by himself but instead has two kitchen techs/recipe testers effectively look up and do all the legwork for him. And his cocky ass then goes up and issues a throwdown.
How delighted am I when he gets his ass served.
Favorite episodes seen recently where Bobby Flay loses?
- Dumpling Throwdown (Winner: The adorable pink cheeked Sohui Kim)
- Sushi Throwdown (Winner: Philip Yi. Flay fucks up the rice. Badly. After Getting tips from Morimoto.)
- Pad Thai Throwdown (Winner: Nongkran Dak)
- Chocolate Bread Pudding Throwdown (Winners: Jerome Chang and Chris Chen)
Do I enjoy these episodes more because it’s Asian American cooks beating his ass down? Quite possibly, because you can’t put a fucking tamale into Asian cuisine. (Okay, the bread pudding is clearly not of Asian cooking tradition, but that was still hella fun to watch.)